Prayer isn’t a ritual. It’s a relationship with God. But, how do you know you are praying “the right way”? Is there a right way to pray?
A church can teach you many things about prayer, fellowship, and the story of God’s love for us. But what if you never went to church?
Jesus calls you to follow Him right where you are. For you, maybe He called you at a low point in your life. He knows how to reach your heart when it’s just you and Him.
Perhaps you’ve always felt Him with you since you were a kid. No matter how He came into your life, it’s a very personal experience.
And, most likely, it wasn’t when you were in church.
But, once you trust in Him as your Savior, it can be hard to know what to do next.
When I started going to church as an adult, I didn’t know what to expect. My Dad always talked to me about the word of God, but we didn’t belong to a specific church.
So, when I decided to attend a non-denominational Christian church in my twenties, I traveled uncharted territory. Despite my love for God and talking to people, it was uncomfortable.
I felt like I already had a personal relationship with God, and I wasn’t sure how these people would fit into that. I had questions …
Do they believe in the word of God?
Would they try to change me?
What if they just want money?
I felt God calling me to get out of my head and just go. So, I had to listen.
The church wasn’t in a typical church building but in a YWCA meeting hall. So, I sat at the end of the last row, with my head down, taking notes.
My usual extroverted self took the day off, and my skeptical introvert took over.
I kept going, sitting by myself and letting that introvert lead the way.
It was months before I really talked to anyone. It was the most out of character thing I’d ever done.
Why is it so hard to embrace church?
I struggled at first because my relationship with God is very personal, just like yours is with Him.
I didn’t want that to change. Honestly, I didn’t want anyone else to tell me I had to change it or make it different.
Most of my prayers took place in my car while driving. I just talked to God all the time.
I was afraid that a church full of people who knew “the right way to pray” would try to take it away. Or judge me for not being just like them.
I couldn’t have been more wrong.
I found out that many of those people did the same thing. They had their own relationship with God too.
Your relationship with God involves talking to Him. You may hear people talk about “prayer life.” I didn’t know what that meant, but it’s just a way of saying how you meet with God.
The most important thing you can do is spend time with God through prayer. As much time as you can.
Whether you go to church, spend time in your room, or even take a walk to talk to Him, it’s all part of building your relationship.
“Continue earnestly in prayer, being vigilant in it with thanksgiving” Colossians 4:2
There’s a lot to learn from this one verse. So let’s break it down.
Earnestly in prayer
When you are praying, are you really sharing your heart with God? This is your Father. He knows you inside and out and created every part of you. He wants you to share your deep desires with Him.
Instead of passively reciting “our Father who art in heaven,” maybe start with “God I don’t know what to do. I need your help. Please search my heart. In Jesus’ holy name I pray…”
The Lord’s prayer is wonderful, and it was taught to us by Jesus. But, God also wants you to open your heart … what’s in it right now?
Fear. Anxiety. Shame. Guilt. Despair. Love. Faith. Joy.
You can share all of that with Him.
Jesus teaches “But you, when you pray, go into your room, and when you have shut your door, pray to your Father who is in the secret place; and your Father who sees in secret will reward you openly” Matthew 6:6
Prayer isn’t for show. It’s for you and God.
No one can tell you what you should say because no one knows what’s in YOUR heart except God.
Being Vigilant in Prayer
When you wake up in the morning, what is the first thing you do?
You probably do that thing every day. You either have to do it, or you choose to do it. Either way, it’s part of your daily life.
Life is crazy, especially with what’s going on in the world right now. The day will easily get away from you.
That’s why being intentional in planning time for God helps. Although, I have to admit I struggle with this sometimes.
Spending 10 minutes with God in the morning before everyone in the house wakes up can change your entire day.
Vigilance means alert, aware, and attentive.
The time you sit down to pray will be the time you’re most attacked by Satan. He’ll try to distract you, even in the middle of your prayer.
Do you know why?
Because the more time you spend with God, the stronger His spirit is within you.
That is a threat to Satan.
There is no higher level of importance than your relationship with the living God. Through Jesus Christ, you can have the connection with God He’s always wanted, and you’ve always craved.
Pray with Thanksgiving
It’s easy to forget what we’ve once prayed for when things are going good, right?
Outta sight, outta mind.
The hard stuff He’s carried you through becomes part of your past that you don’t think about every day. We get used to our lives quickly moving, and overlook blessings right in front of our faces.
Try to remember what Jesus has done for you. You can experience joy, peace, and the full grace of God because of Him.
Look around you and find the goodness He’s put in your life.
This is not to guilt you in any way, just encouragement to open your heart and mind to the blessings God has given you.
If it’s hard for you to see, spend more time with Him. Tell Him about it. Let Him know you want to see your life as He does.
How does prayer change your life?
Here are a few (among many) ways:
- You get closer to Jesus
- You start to see yourself and your life in a different, positive light
- You develop a hunger for more Jesus in your life
- You see the path God is putting in front of you
- You make time with God a priority, which helps you focus
- Your heart is guided toward what God wants, not just what you want
- You grow in your spiritual life
If you are struggling to find time to talk to God, you are not alone.
Remember, your relationship with God is personal and different from everyone else’s.
The best thing you can do is simply make the time.
You’ll see a transformation occur in your life.
It’s time with your Father through Jesus, your Savior. They are waiting for you.
I am finding it difficult to prayer…not sure why that is as I want so much to be in the presence of God and to hear his voice. There is nothing more I love than giving praise to the Holy One, but I find it hard to do via the traditional way of praying.
Bouts of praying in the car, or while I am in the shower….but this way, I don’t think I am hearing from God what it is he has to say to me. Am I wrong in thinking this?
I have so much on my mind but it is so hard to put in words…so difficult.
Prayers for my deliverance from my tobacco smoking are welcomed.
All this is why I questioned my relationship with Christ; how can I be still smoking after repentance, after all he has and still doing for me? I know Romans 3:23 says we all have sinned and fall short of the Glory of God, but I do not want to take God’s Grace for granted.
I am so conflicted at the moment.
I have messed up soo much in my life, and I’ve tried let go of all the sins, That I do not deserve Jesus’ glory or forgiveness because I keep sinni g.
I don’t trust what humans say to me. I’ve heard so many lies, and pastors taking advantage of people I do not trust humans who try and tell me what God wants of me.
Denise,
I’m sorry you’ve had a difficult time. I’ve thought the same thing about messing up so bad and not being worthy of Jesus. The important realization is not that we are unworthy, but that HE IS WORTHY to redeem us through God’s grace. I struggle too, but taking the focus of what I can’t do and focus on what Jesus CAN do is what helps everyday. It’s difficult to trust because lies are everywhere. That’s why it’s so important to have your own relationship with God, reading His word, and praying to Him. No one can take away your relationship with God, and He will always show you the way.
I know exactly how you are feeling!